a good re...

a good resting day, after 3 days working, studynig and not sleeping, I got some rest today..tomorrow I got to help the tutor of the Advanced Photography class, and will have about 4 hours for myself in the darkroom... that wil be nice, in total I will get 8 hours in the darkroom, enough for some 10 films processed and some 15 photos enlarged .!!!!Sheridan's birthday's party page gave me some headache but it is gonne now.....Still lookin for someone who would like to go to te Electric Ballroom for free tomorrow though....

hey, d...

hey, does anyone want to go for FREE to the Electric Ballroom this friday ?

Bibliogoth Photos

I feel like blowing up Jessops, they just wrecked my film, I told them very clearly to Push process 2 point, I paid the extra for that, and they did't....All they said was ooops, sorry, gave me my money back and a film. How am I supposed to remake the photos with that....???I just went back to college right to the dark room and redid some of the enlargments myself, but what could I do with screwed up negatives. ? , in the end I managed to get 2 decent photos, 2 almost usable and some 10 that are somewhat horrendous......

Gotta write to...

Gotta write tomorrow, just too tired.......

Thanks a lo...

Thanks a lot you people, most of all glensc, sphinxi and sweetcyanide. For all the suport and help you gave me during my housing crisis, I hope I can sort It out now, yout help was Invaluable. Thank you all very much.....

I'm...

I'm almost over the edge, my stupid landlord just said that he can come here at any time and quick me out, cause he is making no tenancy agreement, obviously he is paying council tax as if the property was not being rented...... And here am I waiting for some stupid landlor kick me out ..... that's just unbelievable....... the asshole is making a big time fraud and I am the one who end up homeless..........

Finally got...

Finally got my own computer, don't have to share with the rest of the flat anymore, just share the ADSL...Just collected bits and pieces, helped my landlord woth his GC and kept his old one and printer, the other week found a monitor in the street, in the end now I have a quit nice machine.....This virose still makes me lethargic though.....

Had just a s...

Had just a sick day, low fever but constant 38, was going to the B Movie, but had to stay at home and rest...Going to bed early see if I get better...

my bloody mail...

my bloody mail server is down again..... Those stupid bastards keep on sending the two MXs to the same machine, even though it is against the law..... I miss having my own Sendmail at home ......

Got to La...

Got to Lambeth college today, had to do a stupid test to see if I was not retarded or somethig. Quite stupid going to college after 7 years in University, but I will get to use their Photographic Studios and the Darkroom, free chemics and paper...... no more money to jessops and I will get to take MANY more photos, they also have nice media labs and equipment.... I think it will be quite nice there...... Got a terrible Flu and a little fever, but I'm gettin better....I will probably be going to that B-Movie tommorrow....

Hey,...

Hey, is anyone out there going to Slimes this weekend, I want to go there, but not alone, at least not in the first time !!!.............

Had m...

Had my stupid Habitual Residency test, where I had to explain why I moved here, I really wanted to say: Too much sun in Rio.... but I don't think they would go for it.Have an interview at Lambeth college, they got me vacancies in a very nice course, gotta choose which one....

Forms and more Forms

Today was form filling day for benefits.... too many forma, but very well written and the staff at the jobcentre here is quite nice...Got my interview, now I need another one explaining what am I doing here in the UK, why did I come here... What do I say,...?Too much sun in Rio...... People complain but I think the jobseeker deal is quite good, they will pay for my rent, my transport and more 53 quid per week, not enoughto live, but enough to survive.... for a little while at least...The great point is that I get to study for free, going to Lambeth college do some courses that usually cost 640 pouds per year for just 10......

Here it is:I...

Here it is:I Know, I AloneI know, I aloneHow much it hurts, this heartWith no faith nor lawNor melody nor thought.Only I, only IAnd none of this can I sayBecause feeling is like the skySeen, nothing in it to see.Fernando Pessoa (1932)Translated by alexmatt on 06/03 somewhere between 3 and 5 am

Loneliness

Today my friends went back to Polland, my two good friends, Radek and Ewa, I miss them already, they where my only friend in this city, always ready to listen to me, to help me when I needed, to be just great friends....I feel even lonelier now in this city, far from what I used to call home, and far from anyone I can call a friend, someone I can talk to when I feel lonely, someone to be there for me....It is just ,,,, I don't know what it is, .....I won't be sleeping again this night, too depressed for that, maybe I'll get going with another Poem.....

stupid flat mate

ahhhrrrrggg.... the stupid guy who lives in the room besides mine just quicked the ADSL modem and screwed up completely the ethernet cable, I had to make a new ending using a kitchen knife and fingernail pliers.....

I was a...

I was almost done with the camera, new mirror, LCD working quite well, then, the motor was not loading the bloody film. ... and I just don't have the tools here, so I went to 3 different camera shops and not one of them would let me use their tools, .... one offered to fix it for 150 quid !!!!, that was a 30 pound repair,, so in the end a guy offered me 100 quid for the camera and I just sold it, Money for Whitby !!!! just need to find a ticket now...

If, After I D...

If, After I Die" If, after I die, they should want to write my biography, There's nothing more simple. I had just two dates, of my birth and of my death. In between the one and the other all the days where mine. I am easy to describe. I lived like mad. I loved things without any sentimentality. I never had a desire I could not fulfil, because I never went blind. Even hearing was to me never more than an accompaniment of seeing. I understood that things are real and all different from each other; I understood it with the eyes, never with thinking. To understand it with thinking would be to find them all equal. One day I felt sleepy like a child. I closed my eyes and slept. And by the way, I was only Nature poet."..Fernando Pessoa, Portuguese PoetTranslated by alexmatt on 10/03...

What a...

What a crazy evening, I got a call to go work as still Photography assistant, had to go to east Croydon, as I did not sleep last night I just feel asleep on the train and ended up at Gatwick !!!!, then got the train back and got there 1 hour late, the funny thing is that everyone was there just seating and talking, cause the make-up/hairdresser did not show up....... so my being late was no problem..... Then the photographer gave me his F90X which had a big accident, he told me I could use it for spare parts, it had 5 problems, 1. LCD display 2. shutter not firing, 3. internal LCD a little crazy, 4. broken mirror, 5 mirror not returning.So, on my way back I got the shutter to work with the MB10 attached, as I like it a lot, no problem, the internal lcd is no problem I can make out the info anyway. I also got the mirror back into its place, so it returns now. The only problems now are the LCD display that I don't use anyway, the internat LCD that I can understand the way it is. It only fires with the 2nd shutter, and that is the one I like anyway. now, gotta make a new mirror, no big deal......... did all that on the way back......The way back was funny, the only train available left me at the Blackfrier's, I just went walking past the bridge when I figured out I was going the wrong way, so I returned, just foud 2 glasses of a really good wine just lying in the bridge, ..... It was a great wine..... Helped me to walk the way to cheapside to get bus 25.....Found the perfect place to take some night pictures, on the first third of Blackfriars Bridge, wanna do some Long exposition photos there.... just need someone to help me, 2 cameras tripod, etc........Well, after 3 hours I got home, and that's it, done complete, resign yourself to your defeat :) ...

One more sle...

One more sleepless night, got my (in)famous insomnia, got used to that already, happens at least once a week, so I try to make the best out of it, reading, or something else, this night I spent looking' for courses on the net.... and listening a little more to my favorite musician Yuri Bashmet.. , the guy can just play Anything on the Viola, he is just the best, he drinks half a bottle of Vodka before the recital, and the other half in the intermission, like a good Russian. got the chance to have a drink of his vodka in the Barbican a couple months ago, and he will be playing here again in December, can't miss it...... I think I will go to the post now, I know there is a package there for me....

Wow, feeli...

Wow, feeling much better now, got to drink a LOT of diet coke to get better, it is the only thing that works...Had some very stupid argument with my flatmates, it was very distressing..... but now it is alright...Gotta move from here soon though, wanna go to Camden or somewhere like that....

Wow...

Wow, got really sick today, some allergy to my medicine, it was terrible, an excruciating pain and almost loss of contience, got better now.....Gotta go back to RBS tomorrow, finish opening my account.....

My Dear Loretta...

Gotta get a bloody job soon enough, I just miss my Viola too much,,, just can't sell her

No...

Nothing much going on today, will have my CDL interview tomorrow though, hope it works out....
Meanwhile, been chatting to my great friend Awo Ifayode a.k.a.. Digao

This is the beginning.....

Got my code from spangle_kitten, very gratefull for that, will learn how to make this thing work in the next couple days... had a very nice chat with wolf_shadow, so this is just one of the first good days in this city of gray...

...

Got to the bibliogoths meeting today, it was just great, very nice and inteligent people, and a discussion about a great book, nice wine from raven_stoker :). Got the book from wolf_shadow Gotta get the photos processed soon, just looking for someone who will let me use his/her lab, otherwise will have to go to Jessops..... Got a lot of fun on the way back with wolf_shadow and sheridanwilde. Now I feel I can live here in London....

alexmatt

Arrived in London, don't know exactly why, just sold my stuff in Rio, got the rest, and came here, don't know anyone, don't know where to go, I think that makes me a sort of nomad,.... I hope I like it here...